Public Transport Is Not My Aesthetic
The public transport scene in Lagos (and maybe the whole of Nigeria?) is nothing to write home about. It is terrible. It is tiring. It is evil. And it isn’t even affordable anymore. Well, nothing is.
I am going to be focusing on Danfos because I cannot escape them no matter how hard I try. A Danfo is a yellow minibus used as a common mode of transportation in Lagos. It is usually refitted to take as many seats as they can squeeze in. The smaller version of this bus is the Korope. It is much more bearable.
The entire user experience of public transport is annoying. The first hurdle is getting into the vehicle. There are no designated bus stops. Of course, you know where you’d get the bus but those places were not created to be bus stops. These stops are almost always a side of the road that has now been accepted as the “loading points”. Apart from being uncomfortable, it is also quite dangerous. I don’t just want to stand on the side of the road in Lagos. Car will jam me.
God forbid that it rains or there’s fuel scarcity or something. You get a new hurdle: getting into the bus. Oh my goodness, it’s like you’re part of the gladiator games. People start fighting to get into the only available bus. They push and shove and throw insults and risk getting injured. Those days are the worst for me. I look at the bus, and then look at the fighting people, and then back at the bus. Is this really the prize? Do I really need to go to this place? Most times, the answer is yes so I pray that there is eventually a space for me or at least, I see a small opening that I slip into.
I can’t count how many times agberos (the thugs that collect taxes from drivers) have had mercy on me and saved a seat for me because I missed all the vehicles that had come because I couldn’t get a seat in the fight. It might seem like the logical thing to do is to make a queue and go into the vehicles one after the other but most people feel otherwise.
When you eventually cross that hurdle, you still have the problem of being inside the vehicle. The chairs are so hard and the buses are dirty and hot. If you’re unfortunate and get one of the seats at the edge, you very possibly will be placed on a seat that’s just a slab of wood balancing on a stick. And speaking of seats at the edge, the driver might decide to not close the door of the bus. What do you mean by “your door no dey close?” You’ll just be hanging off the edge of the bus without a seatbelt or any form of protection like a conductor with nine lives.
These buses are not even meant to be on the roads anymore. They are falling apart. I’ve seen drivers literally start their cars by hotwiring it. In my mind, I start asking God for protection.
Public transport can be such a sensory nightmare for people who don’t like being touched. You’re squished together arm-to-arm like sardines. What do you mean your buttocks are spilling over from the seat in front onto my knees? Why are you falling asleep on me? It’s just too much, honestly.
Then, the conversations. My goodness. I’m an introvert. When I get on a bus, I just want to get lost in my thoughts and get to my destination. But sometimes, people disagree and we end up having a conversation. It mostly consists of me saying “oh” as these people usually don’t need much of a response anyway. But it is still tiring. It’s 7 pm on Thursday night and we are stuck in traffic. What is there to talk about?
The only public transport vehicle I actually like is the motorcycle. It’s not very safe, yes. But then again, what is? On a bike, I get where I’m going quickly and I don’t need to be in contact with anyone. What’s a little risk of accidents here and there that I cannot stomach? Just kidding. I was really pained when they banned bikes in most places in Lagos. I miss them.
See, public transport is a necessity. And it’s not that horrible if you take it once a month or if your commute to work just consists of one vehicle or something. But if you’re jumping into multiple danfos every day, you might as well kill yourself.
